9 Facebook Status Sins

I am a big fan of status. No, not the kind you get when you fly a million miles on united. I’m talking about the status updates you write on social networks. As i’ll share with you in my presentation at the the car wash show this april, i believe that when done well, and with consistency, a good status update can help you forge a strong personal brand and generate referrals for exciting professional opportunities.

A great status update is written with the end goal in mind. For example, i don’t “sound” the same way on facebook as i do on linkedin. On the former, i’m a little bit more casual and sassy, but on linkedin i try to button up a bit.

I have uncovered new business opportunities, closed sales faster and pushed hundreds of new readers to my website with my status updates, so i don’t take them lightly.

What follows are my suggestions of the most deadly facebook status sins. If you find you’re guilty of one or more, it may be time to pause and reconsider your personal brand.

Spam cannon.

The spam cannon posts a non-stop stream of business updates. Look, we get it, you own a chain of car washes; that’s cool. But i’m not interested in just car washes. And over time, i’ll become disinterested in you.

Selfie sexpot.

Wow, you look good in that selfie at the gym, all sweaty and flexed. Oh and the one of you in the car, with the sun back-lighting you? That’s good too. Now put on some clothes, put down the phone and get back to work.

The novelist.

If you can’t make your point in a few sentences, it’s not a point, it’s a novel. I understand on occasion you need more space, but i shouldn’t have to click “continue reading” with any regularity. As mark twain said, “if i had more time, i would have written a shorter letter.”

Quote unquote.

And speaking of quotes, how about you say something original every now and then. Because the yogi berra stuff is funny, but old. Really, really old.

Pets are people, too.

I love that you love your pets. Kitty in the hamper is adorable, as is the latest video of fido chasing his tail. But unless your dog can text like, maybe mix it up? (sorry, same goes for your kids.)

Lurker.

Hello? Is this mic on? I can hear you breathing…

Crusader.

You volunteer for aspca, are active in local politics and think milk is evil. Awesome! But facebook is not a platform for vitriol, and your posts are becoming… <yawn> what was i saying?

Woe is me.

I get it. You’re going through a hard time. But if you can’t find the silver lining, ever, you can’t expect me to be in a hurry to see you or send traffic your way. Lighten up, and look on the bright side every now and then.

Play by play.

So you’re watching the oscars, are you? Outraged “la la land” lost? Wait now it’s the superbowl! “come on ref, open your eyes.” “awesome play.” #pleasestop. Oh that reminds me… there’s one more deadly sin...